I have always been annoyed by Sarabi’s overly dramatic ‘It’s not true…TELL ME IT’S NOT TRUUUUE’ line at the end of The Lion King. Is it plausible that tiny Simba pushed giant manly Mufasa to his death, particularly when the only evidence for this is your unhinged leader’s accusations? Take it down a notch, madre, and try not to add any further psychological scars. PUN INTENDED.
This is how it should have gone, if they’d just thought for a minute.
EXT: Pride Rock, night. The lions are gathered.
Scar: ‘Tell them, who is responsible for Mufasa’s death?!’
All eyes turn to Simba.
Simba: ‘I am.’
Sarabi: ‘Wait, what? How?’
Simba: ‘So, I growled, and it echoed and scared a lizard, and then the wildebeast were so frightened they stampeded over the gorge’.
Simba: ‘Yes! And it made them stampede!’
Sarabi: ‘Right. Yes. Except no, it didn’t.’
Simba: ‘It did!’
Sarabi: ‘Noooooo. Nuh-uh. Physics says no.’
Sarabi: ‘Physics. Says. No. You thought you could growl down a wildebeast army with your tiny lungs, sunshine? No. Who told you that?’
All eyes turn to Scar. The lionesses tear him to pieces for his insolence, because lionesses are fierce and don’t take crap from obvious psychopaths.