To be sung to the tune of ‘Voulez-vous’, by Abba:
Retching in the shower!
Pot Noodles on the hour!
Face on bathroom floor, woohooooooooo!
Lime juice by the crate!
Henry thinks it’s great
That I can’t stop him eating shampooooooo!
Or climbing onto our bay windowsill.
Or jumping off the rocking chair.
Or drawing on his cardigan with lipstick.
You get the idea. Just (!) six weeks left till I swap nausea for a beach ball belly. I’LL TAKE IT.